Petri Brings Home the Bacon

Here's the whole text of the press release:

U.S. Rep. Petri: $2.3 million for Wittman Regional Airport
9/6/2007

Rep. Tom Petri reports that the U.S. Department of Transportation has awarded a $2,327,500 grant to Wittman Regional Airport for Phase 2 of the reconstruction of the airport's Runway 9/27. Petri actively sought the funds for the airport.

Phase 1 construction is currently underway and will be wrapped up this year, at which time the runway will reopen until Phase 2 construction begins in the spring, scheduled to be completed before the annual Experimental Aircraft Association convention in late July.

A 2003 Pavement Condition Index Evaluation indicated that two-thirds of the pavement for the runway was in poor condition, with an average PCI rating of 36. The minimum service level for a runway is supposed to be 65.

Pavement repairs and maintenance for the runway, including crack filling, and partial and full depth bituminous replacement has reached the point where total reconstruction is the most viable and economic course of action to maintain the pavement, Petri said, adding that total federal funds for both phases will be $7.5 million.

"Wittman Field is important for economic growth and quality of life in the Oshkosh area, and I am pleased that we are moving forward with necessary repairs," Petri said.

Airport Director Peter Moll said that the reconstruction "will be of benefit to all the traveling public and to the EAA Airventure Oshkosh event."

Still with me? Sorry to put you through that.

Now, if you have a minute, drop Rep. Petri a line to thank him from wrestling away some federal funds for us kids back here in the Kosh (you can do so here).

And while you're at it, why not tell his staff,

Chief of Staff:	Debbie Gephardt
Scheduler:	Lydia Oppe
Legislative Director:	Debbie Gephardt
Press Secretary:	Neil Wright

to please, please, write more engaging press releases.

"Petri actively sought the funds for the airport."

Somewhere there is a long succession of English teaches feeling a cold and bitter shiver down their spines.

"Wittman Field is important for economic growth and quality of life in the Oshkosh area, and I am pleased that we are moving forward with necessary repairs," Petri said.

No he didn't. Listen, I know Tom Petri's last speech on the House floor isn't going to be reprinted in the Paris Review, but I would hope that a Harvard graduate would speak with a little more elan.

Guys, if you're going to put such an awful sentence in your Boss' mouth he better be good and drunk. That line may as well have been the product of some kind of congressional Madlib:

"__(name of local institution)__ is important for __(good thing)__ and __(good thing)__ in the __(name of locale)__ area, and I am pleased that we are moving forward with __(reason money is need)__," Petri said.

So, please, throw us a bone back here in the district. If you're not going to get all excited about appropriating a few million bucks from DOT, then you could at least pretend like it's a big deal.