Sheboygan

I swear, the weirdest goddamn shit happens in Sheboygan, Wisconsin. This is something a good deal of people in east-central Wisconsin know instinctively, but don't seem to have any concrete proof to demonstrate the fact. For the casual outside observer, Sheboygan frequently looks like the kind of middle American mirage found in David Lynch movies -- maybe Oshkosh's most visible Sheboygan ex-patriot, Kent Monte, can explain this phenomenon.

Well, until a viable explanation can brought to bare, it's about high time someone put together a Wisconsin Death Trip-esque compendium of all the bizarreness that occurs in that place.

So here's a start:

A 34-year-old Sheboygan man is in jail awaiting a laundry list of charges after allegedly fighting with a police officer who arrested him for drug dealing, drunken driving and numerous other charges, according to the Sheboygan Police Department.

The man was Tasered twice and punched by an officer when he resisted arrest after being pulled over about 1:50 a.m. today when an officer spotted a suspected drug transaction, said Capt. James Tetzlaff.

Police said the man has now been Tasered at least five times in three separate incidents where he fought with officers.

This dude sure loves getting a few hundred kilovolts shot through his nervous system ...

The story is a classic tale of a drug deal gone awry and would normally be relegated to the police blotter were it not for one whimsical detail:

A live chicken found in the man’s trunk when police searched the vehicle was taken to the Sheboygan County Humane Society. The man told police he got the chicken from a local fast-food restaurant.

Name one fast-food restaurant that keeps live fowl on the premises?